Amos Yee, the teenage boy whose face is a cross between the leakage from a sewer and a younger Donald Trump (My apologies to Mister Trump), is on the run from the law. You should know Amos Yee as ‘The Most Ironic Person in Singapore’ and the only person who could make me renounce my atheism so that I won’t have to be associated anywhere near him.
He questioned why Singapore Press Holding had not reported on his ‘escape’, as if he was a big enough deal that people gave two shits about him.
As some of you may know, I’ve recently began writing satire. And becaue of that, I think I have a duty to write an opinion piece so opinionated, that it opines for options. Which, all readers should thank me for, as the number of Yee’s “writings” I had to sit through as “research” is an experience I would not even wish on Hitler. Because unlike young Amos, Hitler, despite being a mass murderer, was at least an actual genius in warfare who created the Blitzkrieg, more commonly known as Zerg Rush.
But to the crux of this article, I would like to apologize to the world, on behalf of Singapore, for the completely retarded behaviour and butchering of ideologies that Yee has subjected us to.
First, I would like to apologize to biologist and fellow atheist, Professor Richard Dawkins, who is followed by this self-entitled prick on Twitter. Professor Dawkins is one of my heroes. I love him so heterosexually, he might think I’m gay if we ever met.
Yes, Yee is an atheist, much in the same way that Donald Trump is a Presbyterian. They are both spoilt, narcissistic, bragging waste of time that looks down on others despite their base ideologies showing them everyone is equal, while having the collective IQ points of a toilet bowl having a seizure. The biggest difference is, Donald Trump is terrifyingly running for President of the U.S.A and Yee lives with his mom.
My second apology goes to the mentally ill, for I understand their hardship, and how disgusting it must feel to be paired up with a person like Yee. Because a battle with mental illness is one of life’s most painful struggle, and he literally used it as a ‘get out of jail free’ card.
Just like every other douche with a handlebar.
Last but not least, my final apology is to writers around the world. Some of whom I know personally. People who are using their writing to promote peace and civility. Because Yee apparently fancies himself a writer. And I take him as a writer as seriously as I do with Stephanie Meyers.
One is a sexist who constantly writes about their sexually deprived life while claiming themselves to be a genius, and the other is the idiotically successful author of the disgusting Twilight Saga.
Let’s be serious here for just a moment though, because some of you might think I am unjustly bashing the kid without knowing who he is and what he stands for. I am an atheist. I have a mental illness. And I am a writer. All things that I am deathly proud of being and advocating for.
So, mano a mano, Amos Yee, I am everything you claim you are. I am a heavily westernised, Singapore born, liberal and freedom loving atheist writer with a history of mental illness that criticised Lee Kuan Yew after his death, and I think you are a joke. I’m not even going to humour you with my usual 1,000 words long post. I’m not even going to put you on the feature bar. If you want to be a ‘radical’ and ‘bad-boy’? Go join ISIS, where you can masturbate to oppressed women and fight for your ‘freedom’.